As I wrote about a few weeks ago, my grandfather has not been well for about 6 weeks now. Yesterday he took a serious turn for the worse & has now been admitted to the hospital for comfort care (essentially hospice). I absolutely believe this was the best decision, as he was clearly not getting any better & we all know he would never want to live the way he’s been forced to live since his fall earlier this summer. He has had very little quality of life ever since his fall, & that is always paramount, no matter how much we all of course wish he could/would get better & return to his previous state of health. But none of that makes the situation any easier.
As I prepare to go to work tonight, I feel like I need to share this poem which I composed last night as I was going to sleep & on the drive home from Virginia to NC this morning.
Miss Responsible:
As long as I can remember that’s always been me
Or Mrs. Responsible now, as the case may be
But anyway, what I’m here to say
Is this:
If you think I’ve got it all together
If my face should hide my fears
If you find yourself surprised
At the absence of my tears
The truth is
I cry when I’m alone
Cocooned in my sheets in the dark of the night
Or sitting on the couch, hiding from the light
The truth is
I cry when I’m alone
So if you’re shocked by my composure
Or my apparent lack of grief
Trust me, it’s there; you know
Some wounds run more than surface deep